I’ve got boundaries on my mind.
Namely, the ones we set for ourselves.
The ones that change.
The delicate space between tolerance at maximum capacity (crossdressing, say) and the dealbreaker (transsexual, perhaps) fascinates me as it’s often a very narrow reach.
That narrow reach is where growth happens.
I become a different person.
For instance, prior to my trans ex-GF, I shot down open relationships; actually fairly early on in our relationship I said, “No way.” But hearing her out and witnessing the subtle and dramatic physical and personality changes during her transition forced me to reconsider my position and we tried it out. Although it turns out open relationships aren’t my thing, I don’t regret going there because that experience forced an ideological transformation.
Just like witnessing her transition so intimately effected another phrenic shift in the realm of my acceptance and tolerance levels, which were stretched in so many new directions. The shift isn’t so literal as to mean that I’m open to coupling with a transsexual in the future without hesitation; rather, that my genuine attempts to maintain a relationship with a transitioning GF opened my mind to questioning my established boundaries up to that point.
Every relationship has set me up for the next one.
My previously unresolved psychological scars from childhood led me to a string of unhealthy flings, experiences and relationships. If not for my emotionally unsatisfactory relationships with men I would not have dated and committed to a long-term relationship with a woman. If not for broadening my sexual identity I could not have given a transsexual relationship an earnest effort. If not for a new understanding of my closely examined personal needs in a relationship, I wouldn’t…
I can’t fully answer that one yet.
The next relationship is always so different yet a natural evolution from the previous one.
Once the successive door opens there is no going back.
Thank you for the growth.
P.S. Um, thank you WordPress for the Freshly Pressed feature(!!!).
P.P.S. Thank you all for stopping by, reading, commenting, basically giving my words some of your precious time…it means a lot.